We're all stories in the end.

shmegel:

preferred pronouns: old sport

(via randomincidents)

sexintartarus:

excuse you our porn is of the finest quality

(via randomincidents)

teenytigress:

SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY

(via randomincidents)

krabwatch:

finally an option that fits me

(via randomincidents)

salmiakkivodka:

If dudes are expected to have a lot of sex

But ladies are expected to stay virgins until marriage

But homosexuality is bad

I’m really confused who dudes are supposed to be having all that sex with

(via randomincidents)

fakehighschoolboyfriend:

a musical entitled “may, senior year” filled with hits such as:

“i never knew you wanted to join the military”

“why are you getting married”

“that’s an awful tattoo”

“what am i doing for the rest of my life”

“how will i afford deodorant in college”

“why can’t i graduate already”

“why can’t i graduate already (reprise): why am i graduating already”

(via randomincidents)

(Source: mad-impossible-doctor, via randomincidents)

the-uncensored-she:

takealookatyourlife:

“kill myself” was the most common answer when they contemplated the possibility of life as a girl

Yeah, tell me again how misogyny “isn’t real” and men and boys actually “love”, “like” and “respect the female sex”? This is how deep misogynistic propaganda runs in this world. Men and boys are so viscerally contemptuous of anything or anyone who/that is female or feminine, or perceived to be female or feminine, that they would rather commit suicide than to be associated with— or become a member of— the female sex. As Germaine Greer said, “women have no idea how much men hate them.”

(Source: thevinckanator, via mageofmalarkey)

(via killthefez)

(via coffeeurlgirl)

how-ood:

#That’s it #That’s the show

(Source: thesarahjanesmith)

"The gods gave men two gifts to entertain ourselves before we die. The thrill of fucking a woman who wants to be fucked, and the thrill of killing a man who wants to kill you."

 Daario Naharis (via shrine-of-the-many-faced-god)

(via mageofmalarkey)

coffeeurlgirl:

(by stefanyalves)

"Be like the flower
who even gives its fragrance
to the hand that crushes it"

Imam Ali (via femmeverbale)

(Source: seabois, via diamondsanddandylions)

coffeeurlgirl:

Le scaphandre et le papillon